Life in a Sand Box

When you live in a giant sand box, what is there to do for fun?  We look to what we have.

An hour of up and down the hills of the dunes; we had a blast.

Of course since we live on the eastern side of this giant sand box we are up against a beach, so after a terrific run on the sands, we had lunch at the beach house.

The Ugly Black Bag

There are times when I get very frustrated wearing the black robe, known as an Abaya. Especially when it is very hot. I just want to take it off and get some air, but for the half of the year that the temperature is comfortable or even a bit chilly I don't really mind it.  Roberto, on the other hand, really hates it.  He calls it the ugly black bag.  He  wouldn't mind so much if they were different colors, but seeing me always in black he finds depressing.

My coat rack with Abayas. Let's see, which should I wear, the black, black or black.

Anyway, a few weeks ago, there was a Ladies Coffee Outing for our compound ladies. A compound bus would take those ladies who signed up to a coffee house for breakfast at 9:00. I signed up, but hardly anyone had and I was afraid it might be cancel so I talked a friend into signing up with me.  The morning came and I had totally spaced out the event.  After enjoying my morning coffee in PJs, I went upstairs to get dressed, but got distracted and started doing some organizing and cleaning the bathroom so I just pulled on an old house dress I sometimes wear around the house when cleaning, but never out.  At 8:50 the doorbell rang. I looked at my watch and suddenly remembered the coffee outing. Still in my house dress, I ran downstairs, opened the door a crack and said to my friend, "Go ahead to the bus and I'll be right there behind you." I then rushed to freshen up, pulled on an Abaya, grabbed my purse, and ran out the door to the bus. As I got on the bus and took a deep breath I thought, "Thank God for the Abaya."  It would not come off and no one would ever know or see that underneath I was not dressed to leave the house.

I certainly don't make a habit it. As a matter of fact, that is not something I had ever done before, but on this morning I knew that no one would ever know. As I sat down on the bus, my friend said, "If you hadn't made it I would have strangled you."  I smiled.

I know others who have done the same in PJs.

Kenya Safari

I love to travel, but I've spent so much of the past 3 months in a suitcase, it is great to be home and settle for a while. Okay, so just give me a few days and I'll be ready to go again.  Actually, I think of all the women who ask, "How can you live in Saudi Arabia with all the restrictions on women?" It is a culture and worldview very different from ours and there are many things I do not understand, just as I imagine there are things that they do not understand about us -- there have been books written and still....  However, for every restriction, I can list one or more personal benefits.  A big one for me is the ability to travel in and experience far more parts of the world than we would otherwise have an opportunity to see, and at a much more reasonable cost than if we were in the US.  For example, in just under a year, we have visited 9 different countries: USA, Saudi Arabia, Bahrain, Kuwait, St Lucia, Qatar, United Arab Emirates, Italy and now Kenya.  We are from the US and we now live in Saudi, but of the remaining 7 countries, only one of them had I (but not Roberto) been to before.

We just returned from our most recent trip to Kenya where we had an amazing time on a Safari. While exploring the land, there were so many different things on my mind to write about and now I am blank so I'll just post a few pictures.

I have a better idea! Click on Selection of Kenya Safari Photos to easily see a nice selection of our photos. Wish we had a SLR camera, but between our little digital camera and my cell phone we took lots of great pictures.

The following is a pretty good list, though not all inclusive, of what we saw from our jeep as pointed out to us by our guide:

Spring Hare, Dik-dik, Lion, Mongoose, Warthog, Jackal, Hyena, Vervet Monkey, Baboon, Cape Buffalo, Flamingo, Pelican, Various Antelope, Topi, Wildebeest, Eland, Giraffe, Zebra, Bushbuck, Grants Gazelle, Thompson Gazelle, Impala, Elephant, Black Rhinoceros, White Rhinoceros, Hippopotamus, Crocodile, Hartebeest, Waterbuck, African Fish Eagle, Yellow Bill Stork, White Stork, White-necked a/k/a Wooly-necked Stork, Lilac-breasted Roller, Heron, Duck, Swan, Ostrich, Steppe Eagle, Kingfisher and more I couldn't get down or understand the name.

The animals were amazing and beautiful, but the landscape itself was also spectacular and the views breath taking.  We were continuously surprised at how quickly it changed as we drove even short distances.  Desert bush and thorns, to green bushes and trees, to open grass lands, to marsh and back again.  Enjoy our Selection of Kenya Safari Photos.

New Company Car

Hey everyone!  It's been a while since I posted so there is a lot to catch up on.  For now, Roberto received a promotion and with it came a brand new company car and his own personal driver.  Check it out!

Getting in and out is a little rough, but other than that...

Where's Home?

"Home is where your heart is."  "Home is where you hang your hat."  I remember my Aunt Betty Jo saying, "A house with love has rubber walls.  There is always room for one more and the noise is absorbed."  There are hundreds probably thousands of quotes about home.  Some say you can never go back.  Others say you will always gravitate back. 

At our front door.

During our recent visit to the US I over heard Roberto say, "This doesn't feel like home anymore.  Our home is in Saudi."  It took me by surprise at first since it is his 1st time to live outside of the US and it's only been 6 months, but then I can also relate.  I've traveled to many countries, lived in 3 outside of the US, my friends are scattered, and each time I return it feels less natural to be there.  It's just not the same. There are always some things that have changed since I was last there and I've changed as I experience new and different places, people, and cultures.

So where's home?  Roberto loves his work and the people he works with.  We've made lots of friends and are enjoying life here.  However, no matter how long we stay, we will never be Saudi.  I loved my work and friends in Afghanistan, but I was never going to be Afghan.  So where's home?

I think this one is most true for me:

“For the two of us, home isn't a place. It is a person. And we are finally home.”

~ Stephanie Perkins

Below are few more quotes as people have tried to answer that question along with more photos of our Villa in Saudi.  Add a comment and let us hear your favorite quote about home.  

The street we live on inside our compound.

 "Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in."

~ Roberto Frost

“Is it possible for home to be a person and not a place?”

~ Stephanie Perkins

Our Villa from the street.

“Home is the nicest word there is.”

~ Laura Ingalls Wilder

“Home is people. Not a place. If you go back there after the people are gone, then all you can see is what is not there any more.”

~ Robin Hobb

Our back patio.

“Well, sometimes home is a person.”

~ Beth Revis

“It’s funny. When you leave your home and wander really far, you always think, ‘I want to go home.’ But then you come home, and of course it’s not the same. You can’t live with it, you can’t live away from it. And it seems like from then on there’s always this yearning for some place that doesn’t exist. I felt that. Still do. I’m never completely at home anywhere.”

~ Danzy Senna

Congratulations Jessica!!!

We are very proud to share that yesterday Jessica Graduated from Bel-rea Veterinary Technician College.  She has always had a passion for animals so we are excited for her future in a career path she loves.

Roberto, a Mexico

Roberto is frequently mistaken for an Arab and men will start talking to him in Arabic before they realize he isn’t.  The other day he was waiting for the elevator and an older Arab gentleman started talking to him.  When he realized Roberto isn’t Arab, he asked, “Where are you from.”  Playing around, Roberto answered, “I’m from Mexico.”  The Gentleman got very excited and said in his broken English, “Mexico! You from Mexico! You the 1^st Mexico, I meet.”

Fishy Cat

Our compound is overrun with wild cats.  They are everywhere.  Many of the residence leave food out for them so they are not lacking.  A couple of them often sleep in the shade of our back porch.  They are not only on our compound, but all over the city.  About a 30 minute drive from us is a private beach for our compound residence only.  It is the only beach where were can wear western swimsuits, but it has a very nice private cove and includes a club house with an indoor pool and restaurant as well.  We spent an afternoon there a few weeks back and, like everywhere, there were a lot of cats.  This particular cat I chased down to get a photo:

He apparently ordered the catch of the day.

Before it got hot and a little windy, but we had a great day.

 

Where’s the Wedding?

In a land with no addresses it can be difficult to find a place.  There are street names, but no #’s.  Recently, Roberto and I were invited to a tradition Saudi wedding by a co-worker and his fiance.  We were honored to be included and to have the opportunity to see a little more of the culture.  We received the traditional invitation along with a separate information and instruction sheet in English.  The invitation said that the men would be welcome from 8:00 – 10:00 pm during which time they would enjoy a nice dinner. Afterward, they could leave or stay and visit with the groom for a while.  The women meet from 11:00 pm - 1:00 am.  During that time, the women would enjoy dinner.  Like many things here, Saudi wedding celebrations are segregated.

The men dress business casual, but the women dress up in formal gowns with as much bling on them as you can imagine and no concern for modesty since there will be no men.  Around midnight, the women cover up with their abayas (the black robe) and veils and the groom joins them for a short time.  When he leaves, they uncover and depending on the family, the dancing begins.  I was looking forward to seeing it and to meet many women.

Roberto left our home at 7:30 pm with a couple of other men from the office and planned to return to pick me up at 10:00 pm to take me for the ladies event.  He was business casual and I was all dressed up ready for a gala ball.  Around 10:00 pm Roberto called to tell me that they had been driving around for the 2 hours and never found the wedding hall.  What a bummer!!!  They had GPS coordinates that lead them nowhere.  They called for directions and even stopped to ask, but never found the location.

So sad!  All dressed up and nowhere to go.  Roberto was a sweet heart and took me out to dinner at the nice upscale restaurant at the hotel on our compound.  It was a good choice under the circumstances since there I wouldn’t have to cover up with the abaya. 

What's my name?

I've noticed that many of the lost formalities and polite manners I remember from my youth are still the norm here.  Some I very much appreciate, while others I would be happy without. For example, many of the men Roberto works with call him Mr Roberto.  Somewhat formal!  Then there are also a couple of employees that insist on calling him, "Boss." Roberto frequently tells them, "Please don't call me, 'Boss', call me, 'Roberto!'"  Their response, "Okay, Boss!" 

Some of the ladies and men on our compound call me, "Madam."  Because of the cultural sensitivity between men and women, I don't say anything to the men, but I have on several occasions asked the women to call me, Dawn Marie.  Their response, "Okay Madam, Dawn."

Happy Birthday Sheik Roberto

We had a party for Roberto's birthday and enjoyed our guests from around the world.  There were South Africans, Lebanese, Saudi, New Zealand, Indian, American...  A great time!

One of Roberto's co-workers got him a Saudi Keffiyeh for his birthday.

This is a hospital?  Sweet!

Recently I had a doctors appointment at a near by hospital.  I walked it and stood amazed at what looked like a lavish 5 star hotel.  It was beautiful, elegant and did not look or smell anything like a hospital.  It was a short appointment and I was in and out in no time even though it was a first time visit and I had all the paper work and registration to take care of. The care and service was excellent. 

Thank God we are healthy and have no need to stay in a hospital, but if there is ever a need it would be nice to stay at one that looks like and has the service of a 5 star resort.

And for dessert you have, what?

In Al Khobar there is a place call the Vitamin Palace that serves great fresh fruit drinks, but check out their menu Couples Specials.

Hum, we'll have the mango juice please!

Covered & Uncovered; A Wedding

At the mall with a S. African and Saudi friend and their children.

Early in March
It has been fun making new friends and learning about life here. It is definitely a different perspective from what we are used to and it's interesting and challenging not only living here as a foreigner, but also living among foreigners from countries all over the world.  For example, my Saudi friend in the picture does not have to veil her face, but does by choice. In the area we live, most Saudi women veil, but not all. Some like many of the foreign Muslim women, cover their heads only.  Most foreigners from the west only wear the abaya (the black gown) and do not cover their hair or face.  My friend says the head covering is for the religion, but the veil is only a tradition and custom which she prefers to keep.  

On this trip to the mall, my South African friend and I covered our heads to make it more comfortable for our Saudi friend as it is not at all common to see Saudi women out with foreigners.

Later in March
Last week, we had the joy of going to St Lucia for Joseph and Lindsey's wedding. Welcome, Lindsey, to the Olivas family!  We had a great time enjoying the island fun and the wedding was beautiful.

We all enjoyed a catamaran sunset cruise except that was overcast and therefore no sunset.

The day before the wedding we went zip-lining. Lots of fun!

 Amazing what a different culture from the US and also nothing like Saudi Arabia.  We had a great time interacting with the locals.  We met the Lucian mother-in-law of a friend in Saudi and went with her to a local church service on Sunday.  Taking the local bus transportation -- their buses were actually vans -- got us out and about seeing more of the residential areas as well as the countryside.

Roberto and I at the rehearsal dinner the night before the big event.

Joseph and Lindsey soon to be Mr & Mrs.

It was a beautiful wedding and the bride was gorgeous.

The exchange of rings. 

 After exchanging rings and the more traditional vows, each said a few words to the other. They both did great, but Joseph really did an incredible job and I lost the fight to hold back tears.

Introducing Mr & Mrs Joseph Olivas.

So proud of Joseph.

 

Having a great time celebrating.

A Taste of Humble Pie

Soon we will be making a trip to St Lucia for a family wedding. It will be the 30th country I've visited, each one with it's own beauty and each with it's own struggles. I am amazed at how differently people from varying backgrounds and cultures see things. We all want good things for our families and our children, but we often have differing ideas about what is good and/or how best to achieve our desired goals.  Living in any foreign culture, especially one with such a different world view can be rewarding, but also a humbling experience.  The following are 2 such examples from here in KSA:

We American gals are not used to some of the restrictions here that greatly effect our daily lives.  The inability for women to drive is an big example with many implications.  How to get what I need from the grocery store, from the garden center, from the pharmacy, etc., takes some planning.  There are several errands I could run this afternoon, but the grocery store run on today's compound bus/van schedule is not for the store where I like to shop and the compound bus/van does not go to a pharmacy or to a garden center.  Even if it did, I would have to choose one place to go, not all three even though they are not very far from each other.  With 24 hours advance notice I can book a ride for one drop off and pick-up to a location not on the schedule, but needless to say, I didn't schedule anything yesterday.  In the end, I will get the things I want or need, just not in the time or with the ease to which I am accustom.

Another example was an eye opener for me.  It was my belief that every restaurant had a family entrance and seating area for families and for single women dining together, as well as a separate entrance and seating area for single men without their families.  The purpose is to prevent inappropriate fraternizing. The other day, Roberto and I were out and about and looking for a place to stop for dinner when he saw a restaurant he had been to with some of his co-workers.  It took a while to find parking and we had to walk a distance to get there, but Roberto said the food was good so I was game.  Once we got to the restaurant we couldn't find the family door.  Roberto started to open the one door to go in and ask when he realized he saw no women inside at all.  He went to the window, got the attention of a waiter, and pointed to me.  The waiter quickly responded with a strong shake of his head and a wave of his finger indicating that I would not be allowed to enter.  The restaurant was for men only. 

A Lesson From the Chinese

With Last names like Lee and Kim, I am thinking the Chinese and the Korean have a point.  I imagine if there is list somewhere of the worlds longest street names, several streets in Saudi are probably at the top of the list. For one thing, every Prince, and there are thousands, has as street named after him.  As a result there are many streets such as:

Prince Hamoud Bin Abdulaziz Street

Prince Sultan Bin Abdul Aziz Street

Prince Faisal Bin Fahd Road

Prince Mohammad Bin Fahd Road

 You get the idea.  Then there are streets that give a message such as:

Custodian of The Two Holy Mosques Road

Teaching Hospital Street

And other names that for some reason are important enough for an extra long street sign:

Makkah Al Mukarramah

Salaheddin Al Ayoubi Street

Imam Mohammad Bin Saud Street

 Abu Al Mudahfar Al Samaany

Of course every street sign is in both Arabic and in English so with such long names the signs are not little.

While it doesn't happen often, there is sometimes snow in the North.

The local Hyper Panda Grocery Store. Now that's a shopping cart.  It serves as a great landmark.

Little Bites

While having dinner at an Indian restaurant called Maharajah, enjoying delicious food, and the company of an Indian colleague and his wife, Roberto asked for napkins.  The waiter looked at him with a puzzled look and said, Sir, they are right there, pointing to the Kleenex tissue box in front of us on the table.

Our compound offers a private beach cove with nice facilities and a restaurant about a 30 minute drive from the compound. It's great to have a beach area for compound families where we can lounge and play in western swimwear.

Went with a colleague to visit a Church service in Bahrain and afterward to lunch at a nice restaurant on the beach.

Enjoyed a ladies brunch with lots of friends, but this South African lady is special.

Yesterday, my friend Lydia and I spent the afternoon with a precious Saudi women at Lydia's Villa.  Their daughters met at the mall and connected bringing the mom's together.  We enjoyed the visit and are invited to her home next week.  I am especially looking forward to learning more from her about Saudi culture.  From our short visit I am reminded that reading about a culture doesn't necessarily give you a true picture and often doesn't apply to most people you meet. It takes spending time with people to learn and opportunities here are not always easy to find so we are blessed to have this one.  I look forward to seeing her again and to my 1st visit to a Saudi home.